Stories

Invasion of the Zerg Canadians
By Ravil

  • The series premiere for the Zerg Canadians in CWAL Universe, though not the first of their escapades. This story was Ravil's first attempt at a CWAL-story, and is somewhat raw when it comes to the CWAL characters. This story also introduces the infamous Invasion of Irvine, and the Sofie/Ravil love affair. It isn't all that great, but keep in mind that Ravil didn't have a sense of humor at the time. Some say he still doesn't.

  • Part 1
  • Part 2
  • Part 3
  • Part 4


    Consequences of Uncontrolled Gluttony
    By Ravil

  • Another short Zerg Canadian story concerning an invasion of the U.S., written in a six-hour period by Ravil after he was inspired by a Dave Barry column. Enjoy. Worth a toothy Canuckalisk grin, if nothing else.

  • Part 1
  • Part 2


    The Zerg Canadian Civil War
    By TurtleToo & Ravil

  • This serial story is the Zerg Canadian continuation of the (original) Great War storyline back in late 1998, an alternate universe in which CWAL began a sci-fi-esque war against itself. Turtle's first story in the Zerg Canadian series is a part of this series, which began nearly at the start of the War in September, and ended with the Finale (written for all of CWAL by that scoundrel Ravil in his red convertible).

  • Part 1
  • Part 2
  • Part 3
  • Part 4
  • Part 5


    The Great War Finale
    By Ravil

  • Though technically not a Zerg Canadian story, this one was written for all of CWAL by Ravil to conclude the Great War, a massive conflict that basically consumed CWAL for several months. After it died down, Ravil decided to be melodramatic and usurped the job of bringing this titanically hung conflict to a quasi-satisfying conclusion. Not the funniest of stories, but action-packed to a fault and true to the spirit of the War. Or at least Ravil's version of it, which is slightly skewed since he wasn't as well-informed about the conflict as he should have been upon partaking in this writing. Also note that this is where Ravil's fetish with unjustifiably murdering other people's characters was born.

  • The Great War Finale also won the following awards at the 1999 CWAL Awards:
    Most Violent Story Best Mid-Period Story Best Story

  • I swear Leach was smoking pot when he was tallying the votes.

  • Prologue
  • Part 1
  • Part 2
  • Part 3
  • Part 4
  • Part 5
  • Part 6
  • Part 7 (Conclusion)


    A Canuckalisk Christmas
    By TurtleToo

  • A fun little poem that Turtle wrote for the Zerg Canadians at Christmas time. I still maintain that Turtle is the best writer to ever have associated with CWAL.

  • A Canuckalisk Christmas


    Infinite Horizons: Ravio and Sofiette
    By Ravil and Sofielisk

  • The collaborative insult to the Bard written by the Zerg Canadians' Ravil and CWAL's Sofielisk (a.k.a. Alex). This story takes place in the Infinite Horizons alternate universes storyline (founded by Playdoh), and is a parody of the classic Romeo and Juliet. Only we kind of changed the ending so that more people die. It follows the play very closely for the first few acts until the authors decided, "Ahh, fuck this" and proceeded to wantonly blow stuff up.

  • Act 1 Scene 1
  • Act 1 Scene 2
  • Act 2 Scene 1
  • Act 2 Scene 2
  • Act 3 Scene 1
  • Act 3 Scene 2
  • Act 4 Scene 1
  • Act 4 Scene 2
  • Act 5 Scene 1
  • Act 5 Scene 2


    Fate of the Dwarves
    By Palin

  • The first epic story by one of the Zerg Canadians' newest authors, Palin the infested Dwarf. This is also a cross-over with the WarCraft Adventures universe.
  • Fate of the Dwarves


    The Shadows in the Hive
    By Palin

  • A continuation on Palin's series of stories. This one involves the SITH, the Shadows In The Hive.
  • The Shadows in the Hive


    Heroes of the Void
    By Palin

  • The final part of Palin's trilogy of epic stories. A wonderful reunion with all of the dead CWAL'ers.
  • Heroes of the Void


    Cydric Gets His Wish
    By DarkLight

  • A single-part Zerg Canadian story written by DarkLight, the creator of Aura. Incredibly funny. Somebody needs to give this guy a medal and a flamethrower so that he might eliminate all irritants to his life. In it, Cydric does, after nearly a year, finally get his wish.

  • Cydric Gets His Wish


    CWAL: Future's End
    By Ravil

  • Ravil's mid-1999 brainchild, this is a story involving Sephroth and an insidious plot not only to destroy CWAL, but the future as well. Yes, Fearless, it was inspired by First Contact, although it's been significantly altered to the point that only you noticed it, you bastard. *ahem* Although this is primarily a CWAL story, the Zerg Canadians manage to fit in there as well, so its on this page (also because this is Ravil's archive and nobody is going to stop him from putting it up). This is also one of the final missions of the C.M.S. Canuck. Until Ravil resurrected it during the Great Holy War Finale for his own selfish purposes. But that's another story.

  • Trailer
  • Prologue
  • Part 1
  • Part 2
  • Part 3
  • Part 4
  • Part 5
  • Part 6


    Bloodlines: The Zerg Canadian Finale
    By Ravil

  • This is it - the final adventure of the Zerg Canadians, as written by the Zerg who started it all. A sad story of heartbreak, war, and a terrible, terrible scene that involves Lothos doing a strip tease. Snippets guest-written by Sofielisk and Palin, and an absolutely wonderful original song written by our own in-house genius, Turtle Too: At the Fateful Moment. For a good spell it was the longest CWAL story ever. Although it's long since been surpassed in terms of length and quality, even Ravil thinks that it still ranks up there as one of the best. Watch for El Cazador's wonderful title illustration (it isn't hard to fine - Ravil grew addicted to planting it into the story intermittently) and a definitelvey keen rendering by Fron. This story marks the first appearance of the C.M.S. Canuck II for all of you bean-pushers out there. Also note that a working knowledge of the StarCraft universe is good to have when endeavouring to read this story.

  • Prologue
  • Part 1
  • Part 2
  • Part 3
  • Part 4
  • Part 5
  • Part 6


    Still To Come

    New Blood
    By TurtleToo

  • A clever story about Zerg Canadian recruitment. Unfortunately, there aren't many copies of this still around, and Ravil might have lost one of the only ones to exist. Updates on this particular drama will be forthcoming.


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